The May Feature is here. Friends, meet Frederica. I have
known Frederica for quite some time. She has been apart of Fiercely Fearless,
since the beginning. Today, she shares her story that I am sure many people can
relate to. This takes a lot of courage to talk about, and certainly showcases
how she is Fiercely Fearless.
“2007 was the hardest year for me. I was 19 years old, a
newlywed, and I never thought I would hear the word cancer. My dad was getting
a colonoscopy done when they found out he had cancer of the colon, and
that he needed to do more tests the next
day. When that appointment came, he found out, not only did he have colon
cancer, he had lung cancer as well. Soon they were recommending radiation and
chemo. He had a port put in his chest, while he was doing chemo. They suggested
surgery of the colon, to remove it, then have it tested to see how bad the
cancer was. Once it was removed, they came to find out he didn’t have cancer of
the colon! So a year after fighting with the lung cancer, and doing chemo, they
told him that he was in remission. That was the greatest news ever.
So, my dad and I went to McDonald’s and I asked him if he
was okay with dying. He said yes, because he prayed to God when I was born,
that he would live long enough to see me graduate, and to walk me down the
aisle. He got both blessings. He also told me that God works in mysterious ways
and is able to show us messages, when we need to be shown. He preferred me not
to hate God, and to appreciate the life he gave him. I cried out to my dad,
telling him he had to live until he was 83. After that I didn’t care when he
passed away. He said it’s not up to him or me, that it’s up to God.
In 2011 his right arm swelled up to the point to where he
couldn’t get himself dressed or go to the bathroom. He kept on forgetting to
turn off the car when he parked it or why he was driving. We thought that was
off, so we took him to the doctor. Come in to find out he had cancer of the
brain, and they told him this type of cancer is not savable. They told him he
had 6 months to live. Within those months, he was smiling and happy and we were
enjoying every moment of it. Then one day, he sat down and told us but he was
proud of us and that he was blessed with three beautiful girls. I told him it
was an honor to be his daughter and for him to be my dad. He told me to always
keep a positive outlook and never stop
being me, and that he would always be watching me.
As the cancer got stronger he became weaker, eventually was bed
ridden, and then ped talking and eating.
On April 29th 2011, I was reading the Bible and I paused and told him
that I would always keep an eye out on the family and my Mom. That if he wanted
to be with his oldest daughter, who passed away when she was a baby, that he
can and that I love him. Then I heard the death rattle, and I knew it wouldn’t
be long before he would be with God. On April 30, 2011 at 630 in the morning he passed away, as my
mom was cuddling him.
Now at 31 and typing this on the anniversary of his death, I’m
understanding everything he said about God and prayers. I hated God for taking
my dad, but every time I prayed or cried that I needed my dad, I would see a
dart truck. He was a trucker for 18 years. Every time I need a positive outlook
or a reminder I would always see a dart truck.
I’m very thankful for the lessons he taught me, even though I’m getting
them now. I’m stronger with God and
appreciate life and love each day my feet touch the ground.” -Frederica
I know this may be a hard topic for some to read, but I pray that by Frederica opening up and sharing her story, that we can each feel a little more comfort in knowing we are not alone. Life is so hard, but such a blessing to have God’s love and Grace, and putting people in our lives.